Musings on the Holiday Season...

So it has begun. The wail of fire trucks and ambulances, the long lines of cars off the interstate, the ridiculous commercials on TV, those dudes with the bells and aprons asking for spare change, and all the stuff we're going to buy, but will have no use for soon. It's the day after Thanksgiving and the "Holidays" have officially turned virtually every city and town in America into a corny, shallow, caricature of itself. Cynical outlook, you say? I can't say I disagree, but I feel like every year, the holidays begin earlier (decorations began to go up the day after Halloween!!), and get more and more geared toward making a buck. Some people would argue, aren't the holidays for spending time with Family, and showing goodwill towards others? I don't think so....

Here are some things that I have heard from those who disagree with my Grinchy outlook on the holidays. I will present these statements, and elaborate on my feelings.

1. Thanksgiving marks the beginning of the holidays, and gives us a chance to be grateful for all of the wonderful things in our lives.

Thanksgiving is a celebration of one people taking land, life and dignity from another. It marks the beginning of our country's habit of using others to build itself up. Perhaps we should all remember to thank the pilgrims for killing off the indigenous people of this country, so we can enjoy the freedoms we have today. Yay! Whats more, we get to over-eat more than we over-eat as it is already. We are without a doubt, the unhealthiest, most gluttonous culture in the world right now. Can we opt for a more modest meal on Thanksgiving?? Why make food for ten, if you're only feeding five? Can't we prepare a meal that says, "we have more than enough, but we don't have to hoard?" Our culture is obsessed with taking more than we need, and this holiday is a prime example. Just think of all the leftover food that gets discarded after Thanksgiving...here's an article from 2007 that gives some food for thought. The articles I found from 2010 boasted similar numbers, but this one speaks to Thanksgiving specifically. "http://www.culinate.com/articles/features/wasted_food"

2. The holidays are for spending time with your family, as it is difficult to spend time with your family otherwise.

I wholeheartedly disagree. I believe that if you love your family and friends, you will make time to see each other. The holidays can be INCREDIBLY difficult to spend time with those you love. Plane tickets are astronomical, traffic is horrendous, and not to mention, many jobs require their employees to work on the holidays, so we can continue to have all of our conveniences, fun and emergency needs taken care of.

It is also my belief that much of the time we force ourselves to spend with our families is contrived. Many people feel obligated to tolerate cousin so-and-so, or that sister they never got along with because "It's the Holidays, and we're supposed to be a family(insert furrowed brow and crossed arms here)!!" Let's admit it: you can't pick your family, and there's no rule saying that each and every one you you has to get along. Let's try to keep the peace, and not play the game.

3. The Holidays are for resting...taking a break from the grind.

Hmm. I have to disagree there, too. For those of us lucky enough to get time off around the holidays, it is too often full of running around, navigating crowds, coordinating family activities and damage control. There is nothing restful about that. What's more, you loose a whole month's worth of productivity! The holiday schedule always puts a wrench in all things work related, and by the time January comes around, I am (and I'm sure many others are, too) pulling my hair out. I love to work. : )

4. Gift giving is rewarding...and it lets people know you care.

Nope. Gift giving (as far as adult to adult gift giving is concerned) is a reason for us to spend more money, on things our friends and family can't use. Does Mom REALLY need another set of 500 thread count sheets? Does Grandpa REALLY need another tie? Does Sis REALLY need another M.A.C Cosmetics compact? What can you possibly get someone (an adult) that they probably haven't gotten for themselves? Or better yet, how can you guarantee that you'll get someone something that they'll like, even if they don't have it already? Just look at all the stuff around your home. What more do you REALLY need?? As for the showing you care part, I'd like to think that actions and words show you care better than a gift. "I love you" are three simple words that get the job done beautifully! A gift only says, "Look, I bought ya something!"

5. The Holidays are a time when we show goodwill towards others.

So, you give the guy ringing the bell a dollar for his red pot. You did your duty, you've helped someone in need. You got a card in the mail to send money to a local charity. You write a check for $25. There. You did your job...goodwill towards others! So, maybe you even took it a step further, and gave one afternoon to volunteer at the food pantry. You're all good for community service for the rest of the year! Oh, then you got on the highway, flicked someone off, then cursed out the lady behind the register at Macy's. Goodwill towards others!!!

This whole notion of goodwill during the holidays is wishy-washy and hypocritical. People are people. I have a hard time believing that one or two months out of the year makes all the difference in how they (we) view other human beings. Same as making time to see your family, if there are people who actually care about being active in their communities, who actually care about being nice to everyone they meet, they'll do it on their own, with no help from the powerful, suggestive powers of mass media.

6. Christmas is about the birth of our Lord, Jesus. That's why we celebrate.

Well, yes, in theory. However, Christmas has become a commodity, not at all concerned with its religious roots. When I have read the story of Jesus' birth in the bible (sorry to get away from the political correctness, and respect for other's religious views), it seems as that though this event was a miracle, the celebration of it was one of more quiet contemplation. The Christmas we know is loud and obnoxious. It makes my brain hurt. Christmas has become such that many people, even those who are not Christian, or are atheist celebrate it. We "Christians" don't even do a very good job! It's the quintessential American holiday, the biggest money maker of the year, the one exciting event everyone is waiting for.

7. New Years is for starting fresh, and making positive changes.

We'd like to think so. But I find New Years to be a reason to act stupid, stay up late, get drunk and do something you regret. And as for the resolution part, hardly anyone sets goals they can actually keep.

Then, here comes the REALLY sad part: After all the over-eating, the running around, getting drunk, aggrivated, and stressed out is over, we're left with the rest of winter. How useless. January and February are the worst months of the year. Not to mention, we're left to pick up the pieces of what's left of ourselves emotionally, physically and financially. Time to get that gym membership, apologize to your aunt for saying those mean things, take a good, hard look at your bank statement, and get life back to normal.

SO NOW THAT I HAVE COMPLETELY RUINED THE NOTION OF THE HOLIDAYS FOR EVERYONE, THERE IS HOPE :) ...

1. Remember to count your blessings each and everyday, not just on Thanksgiving. And maybe next year, plan a more modest meal for your family and friends. This can make the day more meaningful, knowing you have exactly what you need, no more, no less.

2. Don't let the Holiday season be your only reminder to connect with loved ones. Call your little brother who lives overseas. Send your good friend an old fashioned letter. And if you want to see your loved ones, don't make excuses! If you find yourself alone during the holidays, don't panic! Take some time to enjoy the quiet of the season...the snow outside your window (if you're in a place that has snow), the smell of your favorite cake baking (which you can send to friends and family far away), the relief of having nothing important to do. You can also use that time to go through your closets, to get a head start on some cleaning. You'd be amazed at what you'd find, you may even find a reason to call your grandma, and remind her of that funny incident you and she shared one holiday when you were seven.

3. Try to give gifts that are edible, unique, and personal. For instance, a nice bottle of wine does nicely for those who enjoy entertaining. A batch of your favorite cookies, for those with a sweet tooth. Write and frame poem for those you love, perhaps. Drive your husband to work for the week, maybe. Do all the laundry and dry cleaning for your girlfriend for the week. These types of gifts show that you care, but don't cost much, and won't end up in the back of a closet!

4. Be inspired to become more active in your community all year round. Do simple things, like reinstating the words "Please" and "Thank you" back into your vocabulary. Try to be understanding when out shopping this year. Remember that everyone is under stress, just like you. A smile goes a long way. Try one on, and see how it fits. People will notice! When the holidays come around, think of it as a time to continue your ongoing service to your community and a time to think of what you can do to improve your engagement with others, and how you can encourage members in your community to do the same.

5. Remember why it is you are celebrating. Turn off the TV. Turn off the computer. Throw away the ads. Be quiet. Are you celebrating for religious reasons? Are you celebrating your beautiful family and friends? Are you celebrating making it through another year sober, or alive? No matter what you're celebrating, it is important not to loose sight of that celebration, and not to get caught up in the hype.

6. Have fun, but don't go overboard on New Years! Always better safe than sorry. If you're planning a New Years resolution, make sure it is a realistic goal. There is no bigger let-down than a failed attempt at an unattainable goal.

SO WITH THAT, I BID YOU ALL A HAPPY, MEANINGFUL AND MOST OF ALL SAFE, HOLIDAY SEASON, WHATEVER IT IS YOU MAY BE CELEBRATING!!!

~Cara