So it has begun. The wail of fire trucks and ambulances, the long lines of cars off the interstate, the ridiculous commercials on TV, those dudes with the bells and aprons asking for spare change, and all the stuff we're going to buy, but will have no use for soon. It's the day after Thanksgiving and the "Holidays" have officially turned virtually every city and town in America into a corny, shallow, caricature of itself. Cynical outlook, you say? I can't say I disagree, but I feel like every year, the holidays begin earlier (decorations began to go up the day after Halloween!!), and get more and more geared toward making a buck. Some people would argue, aren't the holidays for spending time with Family, and showing goodwill towards others? I don't think so....
Here are some things that I have heard from those who disagree with my Grinchy outlook on the holidays. I will present these statements, and elaborate on my feelings.
1. Thanksgiving marks the beginning of the holidays, and gives us a chance to be grateful for all of the wonderful things in our lives.
Thanksgiving is a celebration of one people taking land, life and dignity from another. It marks the beginning of our country's habit of using others to build itself up. Perhaps we should all remember to thank the pilgrims for killing off the indigenous people of this country, so we can enjoy the freedoms we have today. Yay! Whats more, we get to over-eat more than we over-eat as it is already. We are without a doubt, the unhealthiest, most gluttonous culture in the world right now. Can we opt for a more modest meal on Thanksgiving?? Why make food for ten, if you're only feeding five? Can't we prepare a meal that says, "we have more than enough, but we don't have to hoard?" Our culture is obsessed with taking more than we need, and this holiday is a prime example. Just think of all the leftover food that gets discarded after Thanksgiving...here's an article from 2007 that gives some food for thought. The articles I found from 2010 boasted similar numbers, but this one speaks to Thanksgiving specifically. "http://www.culinate.com/articles/features/wasted_food"
2. The holidays are for spending time with your family, as it is difficult to spend time with your family otherwise.
I wholeheartedly disagree. I believe that if you love your family and friends, you will make time to see each other. The holidays can be INCREDIBLY difficult to spend time with those you love. Plane tickets are astronomical, traffic is horrendous, and not to mention, many jobs require their employees to work on the holidays, so we can continue to have all of our conveniences, fun and emergency needs taken care of.
It is also my belief that much of the time we force ourselves to spend with our families is contrived. Many people feel obligated to tolerate cousin so-and-so, or that sister they never got along with because "It's the Holidays, and we're supposed to be a family(insert furrowed brow and crossed arms here)!!" Let's admit it: you can't pick your family, and there's no rule saying that each and every one you you has to get along. Let's try to keep the peace, and not play the game.
3. The Holidays are for resting...taking a break from the grind.
Hmm. I have to disagree there, too. For those of us lucky enough to get time off around the holidays, it is too often full of running around, navigating crowds, coordinating family activities and damage control. There is nothing restful about that. What's more, you loose a whole month's worth of productivity! The holiday schedule always puts a wrench in all things work related, and by the time January comes around, I am (and I'm sure many others are, too) pulling my hair out. I love to work. : )
4. Gift giving is rewarding...and it lets people know you care.
Nope. Gift giving (as far as adult to adult gift giving is concerned) is a reason for us to spend more money, on things our friends and family can't use. Does Mom REALLY need another set of 500 thread count sheets? Does Grandpa REALLY need another tie? Does Sis REALLY need another M.A.C Cosmetics compact? What can you possibly get someone (an adult) that they probably haven't gotten for themselves? Or better yet, how can you guarantee that you'll get someone something that they'll like, even if they don't have it already? Just look at all the stuff around your home. What more do you REALLY need?? As for the showing you care part, I'd like to think that actions and words show you care better than a gift. "I love you" are three simple words that get the job done beautifully! A gift only says, "Look, I bought ya something!"
5. The Holidays are a time when we show goodwill towards others.
So, you give the guy ringing the bell a dollar for his red pot. You did your duty, you've helped someone in need. You got a card in the mail to send money to a local charity. You write a check for $25. There. You did your job...goodwill towards others! So, maybe you even took it a step further, and gave one afternoon to volunteer at the food pantry. You're all good for community service for the rest of the year! Oh, then you got on the highway, flicked someone off, then cursed out the lady behind the register at Macy's. Goodwill towards others!!!
This whole notion of goodwill during the holidays is wishy-washy and hypocritical. People are people. I have a hard time believing that one or two months out of the year makes all the difference in how they (we) view other human beings. Same as making time to see your family, if there are people who actually care about being active in their communities, who actually care about being nice to everyone they meet, they'll do it on their own, with no help from the powerful, suggestive powers of mass media.
6. Christmas is about the birth of our Lord, Jesus. That's why we celebrate.
Well, yes, in theory. However, Christmas has become a commodity, not at all concerned with its religious roots. When I have read the story of Jesus' birth in the bible (sorry to get away from the political correctness, and respect for other's religious views), it seems as that though this event was a miracle, the celebration of it was one of more quiet contemplation. The Christmas we know is loud and obnoxious. It makes my brain hurt. Christmas has become such that many people, even those who are not Christian, or are atheist celebrate it. We "Christians" don't even do a very good job! It's the quintessential American holiday, the biggest money maker of the year, the one exciting event everyone is waiting for.
7. New Years is for starting fresh, and making positive changes.
We'd like to think so. But I find New Years to be a reason to act stupid, stay up late, get drunk and do something you regret. And as for the resolution part, hardly anyone sets goals they can actually keep.
Then, here comes the REALLY sad part: After all the over-eating, the running around, getting drunk, aggrivated, and stressed out is over, we're left with the rest of winter. How useless. January and February are the worst months of the year. Not to mention, we're left to pick up the pieces of what's left of ourselves emotionally, physically and financially. Time to get that gym membership, apologize to your aunt for saying those mean things, take a good, hard look at your bank statement, and get life back to normal.
SO NOW THAT I HAVE COMPLETELY RUINED THE NOTION OF THE HOLIDAYS FOR EVERYONE, THERE IS HOPE :) ...
1. Remember to count your blessings each and everyday, not just on Thanksgiving. And maybe next year, plan a more modest meal for your family and friends. This can make the day more meaningful, knowing you have exactly what you need, no more, no less.
2. Don't let the Holiday season be your only reminder to connect with loved ones. Call your little brother who lives overseas. Send your good friend an old fashioned letter. And if you want to see your loved ones, don't make excuses! If you find yourself alone during the holidays, don't panic! Take some time to enjoy the quiet of the season...the snow outside your window (if you're in a place that has snow), the smell of your favorite cake baking (which you can send to friends and family far away), the relief of having nothing important to do. You can also use that time to go through your closets, to get a head start on some cleaning. You'd be amazed at what you'd find, you may even find a reason to call your grandma, and remind her of that funny incident you and she shared one holiday when you were seven.
3. Try to give gifts that are edible, unique, and personal. For instance, a nice bottle of wine does nicely for those who enjoy entertaining. A batch of your favorite cookies, for those with a sweet tooth. Write and frame poem for those you love, perhaps. Drive your husband to work for the week, maybe. Do all the laundry and dry cleaning for your girlfriend for the week. These types of gifts show that you care, but don't cost much, and won't end up in the back of a closet!
4. Be inspired to become more active in your community all year round. Do simple things, like reinstating the words "Please" and "Thank you" back into your vocabulary. Try to be understanding when out shopping this year. Remember that everyone is under stress, just like you. A smile goes a long way. Try one on, and see how it fits. People will notice! When the holidays come around, think of it as a time to continue your ongoing service to your community and a time to think of what you can do to improve your engagement with others, and how you can encourage members in your community to do the same.
5. Remember why it is you are celebrating. Turn off the TV. Turn off the computer. Throw away the ads. Be quiet. Are you celebrating for religious reasons? Are you celebrating your beautiful family and friends? Are you celebrating making it through another year sober, or alive? No matter what you're celebrating, it is important not to loose sight of that celebration, and not to get caught up in the hype.
6. Have fun, but don't go overboard on New Years! Always better safe than sorry. If you're planning a New Years resolution, make sure it is a realistic goal. There is no bigger let-down than a failed attempt at an unattainable goal.
SO WITH THAT, I BID YOU ALL A HAPPY, MEANINGFUL AND MOST OF ALL SAFE, HOLIDAY SEASON, WHATEVER IT IS YOU MAY BE CELEBRATING!!!
~Cara
Friday, November 26, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Dismay, Excitement, Too.
Sunday's presentation of Movies By Movers left me feeling a little disappointed. I hate to say it. It should have been a joyous evening, with people enthusiastically supporting this wonderful dance for camera work not often spotlighted in our community. Instead, it was a sparsely attended event with one technical difficulty, and no Q & A. I felt awful, as most of the filmmakers made it out to the event. Some traveled form far away, only to watch their films with the other filmmakers, and a few gracious supporters. Not to say that it was all bad, as those who were in attendance expressed their enjoyment post screening, and I had, at the very least, accomplished the showing. I was dismayed that by the end of the evening, there was no one interested in beginning a dialogue about the films, as I think perhaps the filmmakers were also disappointed with the turnout, and maybe it wouldn't have made sense for filmmakers to ask filmmakers questions. I have it in my mind to try again in the spring, but I'm afraid that I may have lost the support of those who were there on Sunday, and those who weren't even there, who may have asked how the event went. I am afraid too, that I may loose the confidence of other filmmakers, as one who can successfully create opportunities to showcase work in my community. I am left perplexed, as I had such a positive response to the application process, and many expressed an interest in learning more about the dance for camera genre. It leaves me thinking of how I can better market an event like Movies By Movers when I try it again.
On a more joyful note, Monday evening was for meeting with my colleagues from High Point U to discuss the production of the musical "Thoroughly Modern Millie." I am so excited! There is going to be much glitz, glamor and colorful excitement in the staging of this show. This will be my first very large musical with High Point, and I feel up to the job, and ready to show what a good job I can do with the students. At work today, the students are excited to work with me, I am happy to find out. They are asking me questions, and doing their best to prepare for the audition. Last night proved to be a wonderful opportunity for me to get to know the people I will be working with more and more, since I've been appointed to full-time faculty. I feel like I'm "part of the club" now, and so happy to be joining this little community of artists.
Now, for an evening of relaxation with my husband.
~Cara
On a more joyful note, Monday evening was for meeting with my colleagues from High Point U to discuss the production of the musical "Thoroughly Modern Millie." I am so excited! There is going to be much glitz, glamor and colorful excitement in the staging of this show. This will be my first very large musical with High Point, and I feel up to the job, and ready to show what a good job I can do with the students. At work today, the students are excited to work with me, I am happy to find out. They are asking me questions, and doing their best to prepare for the audition. Last night proved to be a wonderful opportunity for me to get to know the people I will be working with more and more, since I've been appointed to full-time faculty. I feel like I'm "part of the club" now, and so happy to be joining this little community of artists.
Now, for an evening of relaxation with my husband.
~Cara
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Benevolent Art: Nervous
Benevolent Art: Nervous: "A lovely turn out last evening at Appalachian State University made for a lovely performance! We could not have asked for a more gracious au..."
Nervous
A lovely turn out last evening at Appalachian State University made for a lovely performance! We could not have asked for a more gracious audience, and our time on stage was a blast! I think now, both Mackenzie and I are looking forward to a short break from performing the piece to enjoy some down time over the holidays.
As always, it comes down to the wire. Last month, it was sound for "Kitchen Table," done just two days before premiere, now it is the compilation of the films for Movies By Movers, which happens tomorrow! After getting home very late last night, I was happy to see the DVD from Brett just under my mail slot. I was tired, but decided to watch anyway. I'm glad I did! There is always more work to do. After two of the films, there is some extended black and silence, that I feel will make our audience fidgety. I hope Brett can clean up those little spots before tomorrow. And for whatever reason, the color on "Kitchen Table" is off...too saturated. If I need to, I'll bring a separate DVD for the film, as it is last on the program (inside show info!). All of the other films seem to look great, and I just hope everything goes off without a hitch. I go to the theater a little later this morning, to test if our DVD's will play in the theater's blu-ray players. Gosh, I hope so!!! I don't know what we'll do, if they don't. I am wrought with anxiety that the show will not go off, that I will have to give everyone's ticket money back, and that I will be a failure at launching my first dance for camera event. I don't like this thought, and I hope I'm being ridiculous.
I'll let you know how it goes.
~Cara
As always, it comes down to the wire. Last month, it was sound for "Kitchen Table," done just two days before premiere, now it is the compilation of the films for Movies By Movers, which happens tomorrow! After getting home very late last night, I was happy to see the DVD from Brett just under my mail slot. I was tired, but decided to watch anyway. I'm glad I did! There is always more work to do. After two of the films, there is some extended black and silence, that I feel will make our audience fidgety. I hope Brett can clean up those little spots before tomorrow. And for whatever reason, the color on "Kitchen Table" is off...too saturated. If I need to, I'll bring a separate DVD for the film, as it is last on the program (inside show info!). All of the other films seem to look great, and I just hope everything goes off without a hitch. I go to the theater a little later this morning, to test if our DVD's will play in the theater's blu-ray players. Gosh, I hope so!!! I don't know what we'll do, if they don't. I am wrought with anxiety that the show will not go off, that I will have to give everyone's ticket money back, and that I will be a failure at launching my first dance for camera event. I don't like this thought, and I hope I'm being ridiculous.
I'll let you know how it goes.
~Cara
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Beckonings and Other Things
As the month of November becomes short, I look forward to welcoming the end of the year, a wrapping-up of fall events and new beginnings.
This morning, I had the pleasure of taking class with Trish, one of my former professors, now dear friend at the UNC School of the Arts. How I enjoyed her brand of careful attention to the body and soul recognition. I especially appreciated her non-stop warm-up, which explored the centers of the body, their relationship to each other while in motion and the relationship between the torso and the efficient, supported use of the extremities. There was breath to be drawn and given away. There was imagination to throw in the mix, and all of this reminds me that we dance not only to entertain others, and to make a living, but to nourish ourselves, too. A world away from the lovely class I took with Brenda last week, this class seemed perfect for the day. I left feeling "put together" and warm. I realize that as the season changes here, my body craves this warmth that only movement and sweat can create more and more. The warmth stays with me all day. I find this movement also, a nice departure from my usual solitary routine, which though it keeps my body warm, and ready to dance, can sometimes get to be too much of routine, if I am not careful to remind myself to play and to explore my body and its movement personalities actively.
Taking these two classes has also opened up some new thoughts in regards to my own teaching. As I become a more seasoned teacher, I can appreciate these classes not only as a student, but as a teacher who recognizes the unique, beautiful gifts each teacher has to offer, and why each different approach and style is of value. The classes make me think about the ways in which I am engaging with my students, and how I might continue to grow in my teaching during the coming years.
This weekend will prove to be a busy one, with the last two 87 Dance Productions events of 2010 happening. Tomorrow, Mackenzie and I will perform on the third installation of the NC Dance Festival in Boone, at Appalachian State University. I am excited that Mackenzie gets to accompany me to this beautiful place. I have performed in Boone twice by myself, and both times, I have been taken with the beauty of the area. Though it isn't somewhere I would think to settle down, it is definitely somewhere worth visiting. I would even relish the thought of a little restful getaway there. Again, we'll be performing 'Words Apart,' and I hope, as always, that we will have a nice reception of the piece. I have found it so gratifying to go through the process of performing on this festival tour with Mackenzie. I have enjoyed sharing with her aspects of this beautiful state that I love! It will be a little sad when our tenure on the tour is over.
On Sunday, my first attempt at a dance for camera festival is happening! I have worked so hard on 'Movies By Movers,' and I hope that it is evident in the evening's events. I'm so glad to hear that most of the filmmakers are coming, which will make our short question/answer session after the showing quite exciting. There's not much more that I can say about it, other than I can hardly wait!
Getting to the tail end of things at High Point U., my classes are polishing up material for their end-of-semester showings. This year, it seems that the showings will be well-attended, and bring us one step closer to having wide interest in a main stage concert for next year. I am very proud of the work my students have done, and I've learned so much from them this semester. I have been challenged, and beckoned out of my comfort zone, and for that, I am grateful. I imagine that next semester will bring with it, many more challenges and beckonings, which I feel wholly ready for. But first, a break! A much needed one, I might add. I have gotten to the point where even putting on my shoes makes me sigh with fatigue.
Thanksgiving day will be for me to relax. I may not even get dressed. Big changes on the way for the new year! more about that as the time comes.
~Cara
This morning, I had the pleasure of taking class with Trish, one of my former professors, now dear friend at the UNC School of the Arts. How I enjoyed her brand of careful attention to the body and soul recognition. I especially appreciated her non-stop warm-up, which explored the centers of the body, their relationship to each other while in motion and the relationship between the torso and the efficient, supported use of the extremities. There was breath to be drawn and given away. There was imagination to throw in the mix, and all of this reminds me that we dance not only to entertain others, and to make a living, but to nourish ourselves, too. A world away from the lovely class I took with Brenda last week, this class seemed perfect for the day. I left feeling "put together" and warm. I realize that as the season changes here, my body craves this warmth that only movement and sweat can create more and more. The warmth stays with me all day. I find this movement also, a nice departure from my usual solitary routine, which though it keeps my body warm, and ready to dance, can sometimes get to be too much of routine, if I am not careful to remind myself to play and to explore my body and its movement personalities actively.
Taking these two classes has also opened up some new thoughts in regards to my own teaching. As I become a more seasoned teacher, I can appreciate these classes not only as a student, but as a teacher who recognizes the unique, beautiful gifts each teacher has to offer, and why each different approach and style is of value. The classes make me think about the ways in which I am engaging with my students, and how I might continue to grow in my teaching during the coming years.
This weekend will prove to be a busy one, with the last two 87 Dance Productions events of 2010 happening. Tomorrow, Mackenzie and I will perform on the third installation of the NC Dance Festival in Boone, at Appalachian State University. I am excited that Mackenzie gets to accompany me to this beautiful place. I have performed in Boone twice by myself, and both times, I have been taken with the beauty of the area. Though it isn't somewhere I would think to settle down, it is definitely somewhere worth visiting. I would even relish the thought of a little restful getaway there. Again, we'll be performing 'Words Apart,' and I hope, as always, that we will have a nice reception of the piece. I have found it so gratifying to go through the process of performing on this festival tour with Mackenzie. I have enjoyed sharing with her aspects of this beautiful state that I love! It will be a little sad when our tenure on the tour is over.
On Sunday, my first attempt at a dance for camera festival is happening! I have worked so hard on 'Movies By Movers,' and I hope that it is evident in the evening's events. I'm so glad to hear that most of the filmmakers are coming, which will make our short question/answer session after the showing quite exciting. There's not much more that I can say about it, other than I can hardly wait!
Getting to the tail end of things at High Point U., my classes are polishing up material for their end-of-semester showings. This year, it seems that the showings will be well-attended, and bring us one step closer to having wide interest in a main stage concert for next year. I am very proud of the work my students have done, and I've learned so much from them this semester. I have been challenged, and beckoned out of my comfort zone, and for that, I am grateful. I imagine that next semester will bring with it, many more challenges and beckonings, which I feel wholly ready for. But first, a break! A much needed one, I might add. I have gotten to the point where even putting on my shoes makes me sigh with fatigue.
Thanksgiving day will be for me to relax. I may not even get dressed. Big changes on the way for the new year! more about that as the time comes.
~Cara
Friday, November 12, 2010
Life is Good.
Loveliness all around these past two days! Beautiful performances, rediscoveries and good news.
Yesterday evening began with a trip to Raleigh to attend the NC State U fall dance concert. But before I head over to the theater, I meet a young woman near campus to make a wedding dress hand-off! I'm delighted that the Wedding Dress Project is taking off. I have amazing pictures from creative ladies, I have secured two (soon to be three!) wedding dresses by donation, and now I only need to move on the third step of the project. The third step of the project will involve creating wearable separates from the dresses (I am collaborating with a costume design colleague of mine at HPU), and find an organization through which we can pair these clothes with women who can use them.
After the hand-off, I made my way over to the theater. There, I stop in at the adjacent art gallery, The Gregg, to kill some time before curtain. The exhibit features mid-century modern pieces for home and for wear. I see beautiful dresses from the 1950's, just like the ones Mackenzie and I wore in "Kitchen Table." I see architectural examples of the era, as well as home objects. This collection of things reflects a time in our country when people were experiencing a new sense of luxury, given the end of WWII. Rationing was over, and society was looking forward to a more modern, stylish, carefree (perceived) existence. Flouncy, full skirts and stylish smoking jackets for entertaining guests in the new suburban culture, buildings with bold, energetic lines boasting a new, strong image for the country and home furnishings in all those easy colors, flowing shapes, screaming of ease and convenience. Yes, the idea of the era sounds lovely. Of course, we know this was not exactly the case. Moreover, one of the first things that comes to my mind is the fact that this new luxury was mostly a white ideal. I wonder how people of color were participating in this new ideal. Given that this period in our history was before the civil rights movement, how were people of color left behind in this ideal? Did a lucky, affluent few get to engage in the activities of the day, or were these consumer-driven activities largely left to the majority race, as a cultural disconnect? I will as my grandparents for their opinions.
After I left the art gallery, it was time for the show to begin! I took my seat right at the top of the arena. The theater, which holds hundreds, looks pleasantly full. Though the peripheral sections of the theater are empty, the middle sections alone can hold about two hundred, as I count rows of seats. The middle sections are full! I'm happy to see so many come out for a dance event. I always feel that it is hardest to get people out to dance events in comparison to other types of events. The show begins with an absolutely stunning piece entitled, "Museum," choreographed by the group of students who danced it, inspired by the current exhibition in the Gregg. The young ladies danced the piece with sensitivity and it was evident that they invested themselves in the project fully. The subsequent pieces in the concert were a mixture of student and faculty work. In the student pieces, I could see the influence of Robin, the head of the program there, in the students' use of gesture and subtlety. There were some lovely offerings. Laura's and my piece, "Common Threads," was left for the final slot in the show. It was wonderful to see the culmination of our work on stage, with all the lights, the costumes and the professional approach of the dancers. Seeing the piece on stage, and hearing our original music fill that large space got my brain brewing on how we can continue to grow the work. The unique space of the theater brought new dimension to the piece in ways that were unexpected, but made me think differently about aesthetic choices I made in the piece. The work is definitely still in process, but the students did such a wonderful job, and the piece looked great!
Following yesterday evening's activities, I decided to take Brenda (a former professor of mine at UNC School of the Arts) up on an invite she extended to me to come and take class with her. On the way over this morning, I was anxious about what being back in class might feel like. Would I leave sore as could be? Would I be bad, or clumsy? After all, it's been years since I've had a Cunningham style technique class. When I got to the school, I went into the studio, and immediately noticed how old I felt compared to the college students there. Though I am not so far away from my experience at UNCSA (almost six years), my recent life and professional experiences have separated me from the students. Once class begins, I am happy to find that the exercises are easily brought forward from the back of my mind. As the class progresses, I am having so much fun! Brenda's class is spot-on, and is like eating your peas (I like peas, by the way) just as I remember it being. She lightens the atmosphere with much humor, while still encouraging her students toward growth. I wasn't worried about how I looked, I wasn't worried about being perfect, and I allowed myself to take the class as a therapeutic opportunity, instead of an opportunity to abuse and scrutinize my body, the way I would have back in college. Today I left with my joints and muscles feeling happy, and no soreness to speak of. A healthy sweat left my skin glowing. I will be back to class during the weeks ahead!
The last little bit of wonderfulness involves my job at High Point U. Finally, after much waiting, it is official, in writing, that I am to be appointed to the position of full time instructor of dance! I'm so excited. I am looking forward to consolidating my efforts into one institution, and being able to focus my energies outside of work, since I won't have to work four jobs. My hope, is that I can get my out-of-work energies more focused on my artwork, and I hope this will mean that I can take my artwork to the next level. The good thing about that desire is the fact that I feel supported by HPU in this endeavor, and that the school may serve, in many instances, as a platform for me to show work, to make work and to experiment.
Life is good.
~Cara
Yesterday evening began with a trip to Raleigh to attend the NC State U fall dance concert. But before I head over to the theater, I meet a young woman near campus to make a wedding dress hand-off! I'm delighted that the Wedding Dress Project is taking off. I have amazing pictures from creative ladies, I have secured two (soon to be three!) wedding dresses by donation, and now I only need to move on the third step of the project. The third step of the project will involve creating wearable separates from the dresses (I am collaborating with a costume design colleague of mine at HPU), and find an organization through which we can pair these clothes with women who can use them.
After the hand-off, I made my way over to the theater. There, I stop in at the adjacent art gallery, The Gregg, to kill some time before curtain. The exhibit features mid-century modern pieces for home and for wear. I see beautiful dresses from the 1950's, just like the ones Mackenzie and I wore in "Kitchen Table." I see architectural examples of the era, as well as home objects. This collection of things reflects a time in our country when people were experiencing a new sense of luxury, given the end of WWII. Rationing was over, and society was looking forward to a more modern, stylish, carefree (perceived) existence. Flouncy, full skirts and stylish smoking jackets for entertaining guests in the new suburban culture, buildings with bold, energetic lines boasting a new, strong image for the country and home furnishings in all those easy colors, flowing shapes, screaming of ease and convenience. Yes, the idea of the era sounds lovely. Of course, we know this was not exactly the case. Moreover, one of the first things that comes to my mind is the fact that this new luxury was mostly a white ideal. I wonder how people of color were participating in this new ideal. Given that this period in our history was before the civil rights movement, how were people of color left behind in this ideal? Did a lucky, affluent few get to engage in the activities of the day, or were these consumer-driven activities largely left to the majority race, as a cultural disconnect? I will as my grandparents for their opinions.
After I left the art gallery, it was time for the show to begin! I took my seat right at the top of the arena. The theater, which holds hundreds, looks pleasantly full. Though the peripheral sections of the theater are empty, the middle sections alone can hold about two hundred, as I count rows of seats. The middle sections are full! I'm happy to see so many come out for a dance event. I always feel that it is hardest to get people out to dance events in comparison to other types of events. The show begins with an absolutely stunning piece entitled, "Museum," choreographed by the group of students who danced it, inspired by the current exhibition in the Gregg. The young ladies danced the piece with sensitivity and it was evident that they invested themselves in the project fully. The subsequent pieces in the concert were a mixture of student and faculty work. In the student pieces, I could see the influence of Robin, the head of the program there, in the students' use of gesture and subtlety. There were some lovely offerings. Laura's and my piece, "Common Threads," was left for the final slot in the show. It was wonderful to see the culmination of our work on stage, with all the lights, the costumes and the professional approach of the dancers. Seeing the piece on stage, and hearing our original music fill that large space got my brain brewing on how we can continue to grow the work. The unique space of the theater brought new dimension to the piece in ways that were unexpected, but made me think differently about aesthetic choices I made in the piece. The work is definitely still in process, but the students did such a wonderful job, and the piece looked great!
Following yesterday evening's activities, I decided to take Brenda (a former professor of mine at UNC School of the Arts) up on an invite she extended to me to come and take class with her. On the way over this morning, I was anxious about what being back in class might feel like. Would I leave sore as could be? Would I be bad, or clumsy? After all, it's been years since I've had a Cunningham style technique class. When I got to the school, I went into the studio, and immediately noticed how old I felt compared to the college students there. Though I am not so far away from my experience at UNCSA (almost six years), my recent life and professional experiences have separated me from the students. Once class begins, I am happy to find that the exercises are easily brought forward from the back of my mind. As the class progresses, I am having so much fun! Brenda's class is spot-on, and is like eating your peas (I like peas, by the way) just as I remember it being. She lightens the atmosphere with much humor, while still encouraging her students toward growth. I wasn't worried about how I looked, I wasn't worried about being perfect, and I allowed myself to take the class as a therapeutic opportunity, instead of an opportunity to abuse and scrutinize my body, the way I would have back in college. Today I left with my joints and muscles feeling happy, and no soreness to speak of. A healthy sweat left my skin glowing. I will be back to class during the weeks ahead!
The last little bit of wonderfulness involves my job at High Point U. Finally, after much waiting, it is official, in writing, that I am to be appointed to the position of full time instructor of dance! I'm so excited. I am looking forward to consolidating my efforts into one institution, and being able to focus my energies outside of work, since I won't have to work four jobs. My hope, is that I can get my out-of-work energies more focused on my artwork, and I hope this will mean that I can take my artwork to the next level. The good thing about that desire is the fact that I feel supported by HPU in this endeavor, and that the school may serve, in many instances, as a platform for me to show work, to make work and to experiment.
Life is good.
~Cara
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Learning My Place
Each and every day, I learn a little more about what it is I am doing with my life, and what my place is in art.
On Thursday, I had a meeting with Ed, the Chair of my department to discuss how the presence of dance at High Point U will be growing and expanding over the next few years. One thing is certain, that I must be patient. I had no idea how many entities and hoops I would have to go through to get things rolling. However, despite my introduction to the world of college inter-workings, my conversation with my department chair went exceptionally well. Ed likes all of my ideas, and by the end of the conversation, we are both happy with the plan we have come up with. The plan is to begin to implement a curriculum for a minor in dance. I'm so excited! During our conversation, Ed and I discuss what kind of students attend HPU, and more specifically, the students that choose to study in the department of performing arts. Ed reminds me that my students, and most of the students in the department are those that will become enthusiasts, not necessarily full-time arts professionals. After our conversation, I think hard about this reminder.
The students who fill out the ranks of my classes represent a spectrum of majors: marketing majors, education majors, political science majors, exercise science majors, communication majors, and more. Yes, I have many theater majors, as well. Most of the students are pursuing minors, in addition to their majors. Some students are double majors. Some students are double minors. And there is every combination in between. Ed tells me that these students who involve themselves in arts activities at HPU will generally graduate to become professionals who are art enthusiasts and supporters. That makes me think of how important it is to give my students a positive experience. After all, these students will be the ones buying tickets to our performances. They will be the ones contributing to our fundraisers, and sending their children to our classes. After my conversation with Ed, I realize what a responsibility I have!
I always thought growing up that I would be involved with dance at the highest caliber in every aspect. I would dance on the biggest stages. I would choreograph masterpieces. I would teach the next generation of world renowned artists. How different adult life turns out to be! I detest performing in large venues. I realize that the making of a masterpiece takes countless experiments, tries and failures. And I have grown to enjoy teaching those students that are 'raw' in their technique, but desire to experience the joy of movement in comparison to those that are training to be professional artists. I think I don't enjoy teaching pre-professionals as much as more 'raw' students, because the pre-professional students remind me of myself as a trainee...over-serious, inflexible(in my philosophy and methodology) and striving for an unattainable perfection. As I move toward deconstructing some of my pre-professional hang-ups, I can better appreciate the unique approaches to the challenge of moving in ways I have come to take for granted.
I can't wait to move forward with the dance minor plans at HPU, and I can't wait to learn and grow as my students do!
Saturday brought with it a day with Mackenzie! We spent the day in Greensboro, for the second show of the NC Dance Festival. When we arrived at our technical rehearsal, I see Mitch, the TD at UNCG, and I am happy. He was such a big help to me during the NCDF in 2007, and I was hoping he would be there! He helped everything to run as smooth as smooth could be, and our tech rehearsal was efficient and painless. I was happy to learn that after a great showing in Charlotte, our piece(Words Apart) was placed last on the program. But knowing that my former NC School of the Arts dance professor, Brenda would be in the audience made me feel nervous! Being last means that your piece is the last thing the audience is going to see, and generally the last piece is supposed to be the most energetic or poignant. No pressure!
Post rehearsal, Mackenzie and I had a bit of a girl's day. We went to Friendly Center, and had lunch. We wandered in and out of all of the shops. We talked and gossiped and generally enjoyed each other's company. Soon, it was time for us to get ready to perform. I hate waiting to get on stage! While waiting backstage, I suddenly begin to sike myself out...over-reviewing parts of the piece I know so well, over thinking the steps...I know this isn't a good thing to do. I know that I can just get on stage, breathe, and let the words guide me through the piece, as always. When our piece begins, all is going great! I'm breathing, enjoying my time out on stage, then suddenly, three steps slip from my memory. I roll...sit on my stool, do something with my arms...who knows! I then realize how short my time on stage is. That took no time at all...and those who have never seen the piece (even those who have) would be none the wiser that I had changed the steps. But the damage is done. The rest of the section, my mind is elsewhere, stuck on those three steps I missed. The rest of the piece goes as well as it could have, some little things here and there, as always in live performance, but I am both disappointed and apathetic (how, right?). After the show, I am met with compliments from audience members mingling in the lobby, and Brenda has only good things to say about the piece. I should be happy, but I don't think I believe her. I would believe her compliments, if I felt like I had done better.
At 5:30 this morning, as I prepare to take Mackenzie to the airport, she says, "Everyone is not out to get you..." I think she might be right, but I have a hard time believing that, as I always feel like people are out to get me! Not like the CIA is monitoring me, and that a secret agent is bugging my calls, but sometimes, I feel like the people I know and meet, and my experiences are always testing me...am I really an artist? Or am I simply an enthusiastic hopeful? Do people around me want me to succeed? Or are people waiting for me to fail? I can never tell.
So, in conclusion, all of my wonderful experiences lately have been absolutely as wonderful as anyone should expect them to be. I think it is my thinking that needs to change.
~Cara
On Thursday, I had a meeting with Ed, the Chair of my department to discuss how the presence of dance at High Point U will be growing and expanding over the next few years. One thing is certain, that I must be patient. I had no idea how many entities and hoops I would have to go through to get things rolling. However, despite my introduction to the world of college inter-workings, my conversation with my department chair went exceptionally well. Ed likes all of my ideas, and by the end of the conversation, we are both happy with the plan we have come up with. The plan is to begin to implement a curriculum for a minor in dance. I'm so excited! During our conversation, Ed and I discuss what kind of students attend HPU, and more specifically, the students that choose to study in the department of performing arts. Ed reminds me that my students, and most of the students in the department are those that will become enthusiasts, not necessarily full-time arts professionals. After our conversation, I think hard about this reminder.
The students who fill out the ranks of my classes represent a spectrum of majors: marketing majors, education majors, political science majors, exercise science majors, communication majors, and more. Yes, I have many theater majors, as well. Most of the students are pursuing minors, in addition to their majors. Some students are double majors. Some students are double minors. And there is every combination in between. Ed tells me that these students who involve themselves in arts activities at HPU will generally graduate to become professionals who are art enthusiasts and supporters. That makes me think of how important it is to give my students a positive experience. After all, these students will be the ones buying tickets to our performances. They will be the ones contributing to our fundraisers, and sending their children to our classes. After my conversation with Ed, I realize what a responsibility I have!
I always thought growing up that I would be involved with dance at the highest caliber in every aspect. I would dance on the biggest stages. I would choreograph masterpieces. I would teach the next generation of world renowned artists. How different adult life turns out to be! I detest performing in large venues. I realize that the making of a masterpiece takes countless experiments, tries and failures. And I have grown to enjoy teaching those students that are 'raw' in their technique, but desire to experience the joy of movement in comparison to those that are training to be professional artists. I think I don't enjoy teaching pre-professionals as much as more 'raw' students, because the pre-professional students remind me of myself as a trainee...over-serious, inflexible(in my philosophy and methodology) and striving for an unattainable perfection. As I move toward deconstructing some of my pre-professional hang-ups, I can better appreciate the unique approaches to the challenge of moving in ways I have come to take for granted.
I can't wait to move forward with the dance minor plans at HPU, and I can't wait to learn and grow as my students do!
Saturday brought with it a day with Mackenzie! We spent the day in Greensboro, for the second show of the NC Dance Festival. When we arrived at our technical rehearsal, I see Mitch, the TD at UNCG, and I am happy. He was such a big help to me during the NCDF in 2007, and I was hoping he would be there! He helped everything to run as smooth as smooth could be, and our tech rehearsal was efficient and painless. I was happy to learn that after a great showing in Charlotte, our piece(Words Apart) was placed last on the program. But knowing that my former NC School of the Arts dance professor, Brenda would be in the audience made me feel nervous! Being last means that your piece is the last thing the audience is going to see, and generally the last piece is supposed to be the most energetic or poignant. No pressure!
Post rehearsal, Mackenzie and I had a bit of a girl's day. We went to Friendly Center, and had lunch. We wandered in and out of all of the shops. We talked and gossiped and generally enjoyed each other's company. Soon, it was time for us to get ready to perform. I hate waiting to get on stage! While waiting backstage, I suddenly begin to sike myself out...over-reviewing parts of the piece I know so well, over thinking the steps...I know this isn't a good thing to do. I know that I can just get on stage, breathe, and let the words guide me through the piece, as always. When our piece begins, all is going great! I'm breathing, enjoying my time out on stage, then suddenly, three steps slip from my memory. I roll...sit on my stool, do something with my arms...who knows! I then realize how short my time on stage is. That took no time at all...and those who have never seen the piece (even those who have) would be none the wiser that I had changed the steps. But the damage is done. The rest of the section, my mind is elsewhere, stuck on those three steps I missed. The rest of the piece goes as well as it could have, some little things here and there, as always in live performance, but I am both disappointed and apathetic (how, right?). After the show, I am met with compliments from audience members mingling in the lobby, and Brenda has only good things to say about the piece. I should be happy, but I don't think I believe her. I would believe her compliments, if I felt like I had done better.
At 5:30 this morning, as I prepare to take Mackenzie to the airport, she says, "Everyone is not out to get you..." I think she might be right, but I have a hard time believing that, as I always feel like people are out to get me! Not like the CIA is monitoring me, and that a secret agent is bugging my calls, but sometimes, I feel like the people I know and meet, and my experiences are always testing me...am I really an artist? Or am I simply an enthusiastic hopeful? Do people around me want me to succeed? Or are people waiting for me to fail? I can never tell.
So, in conclusion, all of my wonderful experiences lately have been absolutely as wonderful as anyone should expect them to be. I think it is my thinking that needs to change.
~Cara
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